So this thing is on.

You might not cry when you put your kid on the bus but when you coach your six year old through sharing his feelings it might rip your fragile heart to shreds.

One evening this week the boys were playing in the basement with their dad when I went down to yell at everyone because they weren’t upstairs getting ready for bed yet. A quick glance around the room and it was evident something was bothering our oldest, but he wouldn’t share what. I asked if I could name feelings until I landed on the one he was feeling and he agreed. Angry? A head shake no. Sad? A subtle shoulder shrug and eyes that glossed over ever so slightly. Ah, ok.

So off we went hand in hand to start getting the bath ready. I started to ask about his feeling of sadness again and after a little comforting he shared that his little brother got hurt, and when he did my husbands attention was only on making sure he was okay and playing with him (probably to distract him from whatever hurt). Tears welled up as he released it and I held him. I squeezed him so tight as I validated how he was feelings. I’m the oldest as well and he’s right. A lot of times you can feel like you get set aside for the sake of younger siblings. I asked him if we could talk to Mike about it and he was reluctant but agreed.

And this is the part that got me. I explained to the hubs how he was feeling and then slowly exited the room to give them space to talk. Only to stand nearly sobbing outside the other side of the door hearing how Mike validated him and assured him would always be here to hear him out.

There are a lot of moments in motherhood that feel isolating and in every day practice, you are sure no one is listening to (let alone implementing) anything that you say. I hope you get one of the reassuring moments yourself soon.